Resume

Dear Mr. Bill Dewitt Jr.,

The purpose of the letters is to officially announce to you, and whoever it may concern, that I would like to be considered for your recently vacated general manager position. The Cardinals have a very rich history that I am well informed of. Something you may not be informed of is my rich history. I would hope that you would be able to overlook what some people would call “a lack of baseball experience.” To the people that would say that I say this; maybe I haven’t be on staff of a professional baseball franchise, maybe I haven’t played very much or any organized baseball, but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t be the best fit as general manager. I know that before hiring me you would like to know more about me and my back round. I also know that your time is very valuable so I have cut straight to the point for you. (You’re welcome)

Education and Professional:

High School: Graduated with a four year degree from The Wentzville Holt high school.

College: I don’t like to brag, but I do have some community college under my belt. I also graduated from the School of Awesome People with a master’s degree in General Awesomeness.

Jobs: I have pretty much done everything from changing oil, to selling cell phones, to literally sucking crap out of people basements.

Personal:I love the Cardinals and the game of baseball more than I could ever love a human baby. With that said here are some facts that may help you in you decision making. Some of them may seem unbelievable, but remember “unbelievable” is my middle name.
1. I attend on average 42.3 major league baseball games a year. 99.7% of those being St. Louis’ games.
2. I am a slightly above average softball player. I feel that this would help me in relating to my players.
3. The first baseball game the I attended was in Busch Memorial Stadium at a Cards/Cubs game.
4. I can run a mile in under 9.5 minutes.
5. My St. Louis Cardinal licenses plates read “H8DCBS”. You can figure it out on your own.
6. Lots of people think I am the funniest person ever.
7. I have a three foot by two foot box filled with baseball cards.
8. At least four people have voted for me for the president of the United States.

I have now informed you of what I bring to the table. Here is what I am expecting you and the cardinals to bring.

1. I would like to be refunded the near $1200 I spent on playoff/World Series tickets last year.I hope that we can meet in the middle on these terms.

In closing I would like to say that I feel that I would be a tremendous asset to the Cardinal family, bring a renewed since of passion and a winning attitude.

Favorite quote:“While it may be difficult, it is a fact that a 162 win season is not impossible!” Casey Eldridge

Yours truly,

Casey A. Eldridge